I'm a sponge and always have been. An empath for sure. I was one before I even knew what that meant. As a matter of fact, I vaguely remember the day I learned the word and was uber excited there was one for my intense feelings. I could put a finger on it and describe it to another. Still, even full description doesn't convey the magnitude of which these incredibly intense feelings are received and processed.
That is one of many 'strange' personality traits I encompass. But, it matters not how peculiar it is, as it's incredibly real. The suffering of another affects me on the deepest levels, as if it were my own. Once the tragedy has been received into my spirit, it is then processed on it's own accord and then an appropriate alter if you will, shows up and responds; this is another one of my 'strange' personality traits.
I'm also layered--you see, I'm an empath and lover by nature but a late-bloomed fighter to the core. But, only for the greater good of all. I will viciously protect my space and peace, yet nurture a living being through thorn-infested gardens and treacherous waters that has thrashed her about the shoreline. I only desire love and joy to be displayed and only now beginning to embrace it's contrast as simply saying it saddens me; I do however, respect it's need to create balance.
An aunt of mine that I was incredibly fond of as a child began to call me "Sunflower" as an adult woman. I liked her reasoning for doing so...she said, "You're strong and sturdy like it's stalk, yet delicate and fragile like it's petals." That's a great depiction of me and ironically without her even knowing that has always been my favorite flower, so the name stuck. Yet, as perfect of an analogy as that is, it still doesn't quite capture my true essence.
Relevant Story: Forever Changing by Hunny Goddess
About a month or so ago (it could of been longer as my depth perception of time is sometimes spot on and others, not so much), I came to the peaceful conclusion that I'm very complicated. And, that isn't a negative thing whatsoever, it simply is what it is.
"Truth will set you loose!" Said by black mothers everywhere. I love so many things equally and give zero hoots about an equal amount of things as well. Love motivates me, yet if it comes too quickly and/or up too close that's a sure way to watch me turn into a magician and become ghost. The complications goes on and on and on, okay you get the picture. Still, I love me. I love the layers that are unveiling.
Getting honest with yourself about self can sometimes be complicated, disturbing, frightening and traumatizing; but mostly it's gratifying once you've done the work. It's the prior that keeps folks from doing the actual work. The going through.
An extra bonus of being honest with self is when your loved ones or someone you've just met asks for your input, you'll more than likely be incredibly honest with them and speak from a place of compassion, humility, wisdom and experience.
"To know one's self is to know others." Spoken by the same aunt.
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About Hunny Goddess
Wise beyond her years and an empath; this compassionate, energy worker is often sought out for advice, encouragement and most certainly the truth. She'd like to share her collected gems and infinite wisdom (and blunders) with you, as she continues to travel along her journey of growth, love and light. #LightWorker